Goal Setting Myths: Why Chasing Big Goals Might Be Keeping You Stuck

You’ve probably heard it all before:

• “Set SMART goals.”

• “Visualise success.”

• “Write down your 5-year plan.”

But if you’re here, chances are goal setting hasn’t worked for you.
And here’s the truth: that’s not because you’re unmotivated or undisciplined.
It’s because traditional goal setting often fails people whose nervous systems are in distress.

At The Mind Works with Craig, we don’t build change around distant goals.
We build it around nervous system readiness, daily rhythm, and internal capacity.

Why Traditional Goal Setting Fails When You’re Burned Out or Stuck

The mainstream advice assumes:

• You have stable energy levels

• You’re psychologically regulated

• You’re operating from Tower Block level 6 or above (Comfort Zone or higher)

But for most people stuck in anxiety, depression, procrastination, burnout, or emotional eating, this is not the case.

When your Tower Block level is low, setting a big future goal feels like:

• Pressure

• Threat

• Another reason to feel like you’re failing

It’s like standing at the bottom of a mountain and shouting at yourself to sprint to the top—with no fuel, no map, and no rest stops.

The Real Psychology Behind Goal Setting Failure

In The Mind Works model, the disconnect between your Actual/Current Self and your Ideal/Future Self is at the heart of the problem.

Here’s what’s happening:

1. Ideal/Future Self sets a big, ambitious target.

2. Actual/Current Self feels overwhelmed, unprepared, or unworthy.

3. Protective Self steps in: “This is too much. Let’s shut this down.”

4. You procrastinate, avoid, binge, or distract… then feel guilty.

This internal conflict creates a Cycle of Collapse:

Set goal → Feel pressure → Freeze or avoid → Feel shame → Set another goal… repeat.

The DRF Breakdown: Direction, Rhythm, Fuel

Direction (Thinking):
You’re operating with externalised, future-based goals that don’t match your current clarity or capacity.

Rhythm (Meaning):
You’re ignoring your nervous system’s natural pacing and energy levels.

Fuel (Feeling):
You’re expecting performance from a system that’s running on empty.

Why Forcing Goals Can Make Mental Health Worse

For people stuck in low Tower Block levels, goal-setting often triggers:

• Anxiety spirals

• Perfectionism

• All-or-nothing thinking

• Emotional shutdown

• Increased protective behaviours (binge eating, avoidance, over-sleeping)

You don’t need bigger goals.
You need better signals from your body, your mind, and your emotional state.

What We Do Instead at The Mind Works

We teach you how to observe your state, understand your current capacity, and build micro-movements forward.

Before setting any target, we help you:

• Stabilise your nervous system: Using Tower Block awareness, HRV tracking, and rhythm-based tools.

• Reconnect with your Actual/Current Self: Naming where you are right now, without judgement.

• Shift internal conflict: Using the Parts of Self model to defuse Protective energy from Ideal-driven pressure.

• Focus on Direction, Rhythm, and Fuel (DRF): Building readiness first—then action.

When change comes from rhythm—not pressure—it lasts.

Next Step: Let’s Redefine Progress

If you’re caught in a cycle of setting goals, falling short, and blaming yourself, it’s time for a new approach.

👉 Join the Online Course
👉 Book a 1:1 Call

We’re not here to help you set better goals.
We’re here to help you build a system where action feels possible—naturally, steadily, and in rhythm with your real life.